The Big Peace

Transformation machine....

Recently, on my journey to do more of what I really want to do (following my own flow) I've started to be more creative and am attempting to write a little bit of fiction.

I was inspired by a Screenwriting course I attended in Cornwall led by Hollywood Guru Blake Snyder - quite possibly the loveliest man to walk the planet . And not at all how you'd expect a Hollywood guru to be (I thought he'd have a cigar, wear an Indiana Jones hat and spit expletives at you) But no, Blake was this incredibly gentle and inspirational human being - who has created a brilliant structure for story-telling.

(Blake wrote bestselling Save the Cat!: The Only Book on Screenwriting You'll Ever Need: The Last Book on Screenwriting You'll Ever Need and now his second book Save the Cat! Goes to the Movies: The Screenwriter's Guilde to Every Story Ever Told is about to be published. If you want any inspiration on how to write your story/someone else's story/a best-selling story - this man knows what he is talking about. Read these books)

I just wanted to share this post to Blake's blog: It's about transformation:
"All stories are about transformation," writes Blake.

!All stories are the caterpillar turning into a butterfly in some sense. All stories require a death and rebirth to make that painful and glorious process happen.

And it occurs in movies… and in life.

We transform every day, re-awaken to new concepts about the world around us, overcome conflict, and triumph over death… only to start again each morning.

It’s why stories that follow this pattern resonate. Because each day is a transformation machine, and so are our lives."

Each day is a transformation machine. I love that.

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More meditation

Tim Rowe kindly invited me to try out this meditation technique after reading about my struggles earlier this week.

He warned me about the 'hypey' way it's introduced but encouraged me to go beyond it and listen to the free meditation. It has been created by mediation teacher Steven Sashen - perhaps we can interview him for the blog?

I've just been trying it this evening and have felt very peaceful. There is free recording and class at http://advancedmeditation.com/cmd.php?af=569450

Would love to hear any feedback.

Suzy x

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You're already there.

So if you've listened to the Michael Neil interview, you'll hear that I got the name of his book wrong. I called it 'Finding Happiness Now'.

It's called 'Feel Happy Now'. In that mistake.... was the biggest shift I could make., said Michael

If I'm forever seeking happiness or peace.... I'm making the assumption that happiness or peace is outside of myself - that it's something to get/achieve.... versus knowing that it's a choice. To feel happy now. And then he took us through a simple exercise where he asked us to think of someone we loved and let that feeling spread until it filled our body. Look, he said, you can feel happy and peace right now.

And he was right. There I was feeling happy right now.

It's about practice, said Michael. Often we have a default setting which could be anxiety or sadness or anger. and we're unused to feeling good. So we have to work at feeling good. It's a choice we make in that moment.

And that is perhaps where I've been going wrong. I'm a great wallower. I do make up big stories in my head and then wallow about how that makes me feel. My husband has just bought his second motorbike (mid-life crisis???!!!) but someone how I made up this whole story that it was all about me...that he was driving away from me (literally) and he didn't love me any more.

Obviously, huge rows ensued..... he couldn't understand why I was getting so upset about the motorbikes.... (Couldn't he read my mind???) and why I was so angry... (I couldn't say the words 'I'm afraid that you don't love me anymore' because that would show me up as being needy so I chose to be angry/self righteous instead)

And that's what I mean by wallowing. It's not even wallowing about something real that's happened. Maybe I will chose to wallow and be sad if my dog dies or something bad happens. But I chose to wallow about events that are not even real???

I think Byron Katie's worksheets have definitely helped me this month to question my stories.

And what I'm realising is that inner peace is a choice. and it's quite hard work early on. And I suppose, I thought...I'd be hit my a thunderbolt and I'd be peaceful, smiling and happy (ie something outside of me would come and change me from above!)But it's a moment by moment practice and I have to do it versus waiting to be transformed either by meditation or by a guru or a new whistling technique.


What I'm realising too.....I'm ashamed to say that there is a part of me that enjoys some of my dramas....by kicking off with my husband, he's ultimately had to reassure me that he does love me but surely there was a more peaceful way to get that piece of information??? There can be pay-offs to my dramas. But how I went about it was very costly for everyone.
I can't remember who said...that we only drop old behaviours when there ceases to be any pay-off?

Do listen to the Michael Neil interview below if you can. It really is brilliant - because it's simple but quite profound too.

Suzy x

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The Michael Neill interview

Michael Neill was fabulous and a real inspiration. He gave some great tips that are quick, practical  that you can use right away to feel better and at more peace right in the moment.


Here's the interview


What do you think? If you have any thoughts you'd like to share, please leave a comment.

Suzy xx

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Feel Happy Now!

Just interviewed Michael Neil, author of Feel Happy Now! Really inspiring interview and will post asap.

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I'm back and pecked to death....

I've done my 15 minutes of meditation.

I have to admit, I don't enjoy it. I do find it painful. Suddenly I am faced with all the thoughts/feelings I have been avoiding with all my busyness. Perhaps this is the point. Let it all bubble to the surface...? but is it released and gone? Or just hanging around me like a bad smell?

So in the big peace process - what do we decide to do about that? Do we persevere? Or find another way.. I commit to persevering and I will see if this changes. Am I simply resistant to my darker thoughts?

But isn't the point of all this - to feel good? I want to feel good, not to feel pecked at by nasty thoughts.

I will wait for inspiration. I'm interviewing Michael Neil - success coach extraordinaire - for out Big Peace blog...I'll ask him.....

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Meditation or coffee? Just give me a coffee!

So it's interesting to observe my little goings-on. Yesterday I vowed to meditate every day. I know it makes me feel more peaceful.
15 minutes ago, I had a choice, make myself a cup of coffee or meditate....

There is now an empty cup of coffee on my desk and I'm not feeling remotely peaceful (but slightly revved up). I'm feeling bad that I haven't meditated, bad for having another coffee (my third of the day and it's only 11.30?)

What I'm pondering right now is how can we create peaceful habits without it becoming a 'should'/without feeling wrong for having the coffee?

We know what we 'should' do to make us thinner/healthier/more peaceful so why don't we do it?

It's that short-term pleasure versus long-term gain battle. It's about that moment of choice in the moment.

And I must admit, it's not my best moment. I've always been a bit of f**k it girl (oh, f**t it, I'll just have the one)
It took me about 5 years to give up smoking because I was always saying 'f**t it', I'll just have one more fag. (and even now after 10 years or so of not smoking, if I have a drink...I still want a fag....!)

I don't want my life to be about denial. My big peace feels warm and comfortable and has coffee in it.

What do I want? To feel good. Warm coffee with a sugar in it makes me feel good. But you know, that's how I used to feel about cigarettes.

Maybe there is something about this discipline thing in the short-term (or even long-term). Like Matthieu Ricard, the Buddhist monk in his book Happiness has been saying......we need to work at inner peace - it's something that doesn't just happen, we do need to train the mind.

I think I do have that instant gratification thing going on. 30 days to inner peace? Great, let's get it/achieve it/do it then.....tick that box, next?! I know this but I need to be reminded......the big peace.... it's not a destination....it's a process....a lifelong process...

And maybe I need to factor in some discipline. Ok, let's try again.

I'm going to meditate now, meet you back here in 15 minutes.

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meditation...

I've known how to meditate for 10 years now. When I was a journalist, I was sent off to learn transcendal meditation for New Woman magazine and I wrote a piece on how it improved my sex life in 30 days...! (Apparently the TM office phone rang off the hook!)

Why oh why then haven't I kept it my meditation habit up? I know that it benefits me in every department - not just in the bedroom.

I meditate when I remember. It's not a habit. I'm reading Happiness by Matthieu Ricard, Buddhist monk, and he encourages us to cultivate happiness by practising habits that create good soil for happiness to take root in. Happiness does not just happen, he says, we work at it just like we do at getting fit at the gym.

Meditation is one thing that I know makes me feel peaceful on every level - if I do it.

Am I just lazy?

Maybe just afraid because the first few minutes (sometimes the whole 20 minutes) has all my horrible, mean thoughts/worries/fears rising to the surface to peck at my brain. If I keep myself distracted with my busyness, then I don't have to notice their pecking.

My meditation teacher described it as being on the surface of stormy sea and feeling sea-sick, terrifed you're going to drown until you surrender and learn to breathe with your scuba-diving equipment and start listening to the calm in and out of your breathing and you're under the waves, safe from hitting your head on the boat.

Until you see that shark.....

We are currently day 18 of the Big Peace programme and I now declare I will be meditating every day for the rest of the programme.

want to join me?

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The Big Peace on Facebook

As most of you will know, The Big Peace is very hip and as such is down with all the cool kids...or at least on Facebook anyway!

Now I know it's all very new to a lot of you (me too!) so we've got a short little video overview to get you started.

You might need to allow the video to buffer a little depending on your internet connect speed - Just click the link below and press play and when the video opens up, press the pause button (bottom left of the screen) to allow the while line to move from left to right along the very bottom before pressing play again.

Click here for the video

If you have questions please leave them as comments to this post (click on "Comments").

Have fun and make sure you come join us on Facebook!

Suzy xx

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What to do about The Big Peace?

A number of people have been wondering about what happens with the big peace after 30th Sept...

Well, me too! I must say I am loving putting all my focus on contentment….and peace……..I’m doing this programme with you….doing the exact same exercises as you and I must say, I’m really enjoying myself (with the occasional wobble).

I have a few thoughts on how we could keep thing going. One that's not as intense - i.e. not daily emails. What about a year of peace????

What I'd really love is to get your thoughts. What would you like to become of The Big Peace? Leave your comments below (just click on "comments")

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I'll also be launching my coaching Golden Tickets soon which is an opportunity for you to make it all much more personal, if that's what you'd like to do.

Actually the great thing about the Golden Tickets is that you can decide to use the one-on-one time as you'd like to - as your coach, I'm here to serve you!

In a few days I'll have more details, but if you have any questions you can email me [email protected]

Talk soon,

Suzy xx

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